Wednesday, August 30, 2006


By Chinuku(Raindrop)

I am
Very honest person.
Thinking how my gradmother felt when she was sick & died in the hospital 5 months back.
Thinking how my days will be if I decide to send my son to school next week.
Thinking how some people can eat whatever and still stay slim.

I said
To my hubby “lets go for a drive in this breathtaking weather”.

I want
To feel satisfied with whatever I have.
To be a better person.
To lose weight.
A house in mountains or hilly area.

I wish
My parents weren’t divorced. (still wanted to stay with my grandma though)
My husband had feelings. (he is a great guy but can’t show his feelings)
I was skinny.
I had magic power to help everybody in the world and I could go to India by twitching my nose or just blinking.(yes, you can stop by my place & I would love to drop you wherever in India)
I wasn’t too emotional & sensitive.
People stop giving money(few dollars are ok) to temples here where they spend most of money on unnessary things and save the same money to give people in India who really really are in need.

I miss
My Grandmother.
The smell of Indian dirt & cooking especially in rainy season. *sigh

I hear
Song of Fanaa “Chand Sifarish”
my son talking
lots of voices in my head. (I think I talk to myself all day long in my head)
And wonderful sound of rain.

I wonder
How can my son talk soooo much and not feel tired.
How it will be if you could really see all the Gods and heaven.(yes, I try to be good but Im not talking about going to heaven after death.. just in general)
How I will control myself when my son will start school.

I regret
Not started working after I finished my studies.
Saying few things to my grandma & other people that I shouldn’t have.

I am
A good cook.
Very loving, talkative, short temper & stubborn.
Possesive & very insecure about my kids.
Good & caring at heart.
Very lazy, moody, tired & emotional lately.
Trying to be a good mother & wife.
Trying to connect with God on regular basis.

I dance
With rain. Actually my heart dances with rain.
On the tiny fingers of my daughter.

I sing
Old love & sad songs (only in my head).
“Chand sifarish” of Fanaa
Pyar to hona hi tha
Jab pyar kisi se hota hai(old & new)
Nursery rhymes
Gayatri Mantra

I am not
Patient at all.
A Risk taker.
Very cheerful lately.

I cry
Easily. Hubby always says that I have hidden taps in my eyes and everytime I feel sad he started doing action of opening the tap & I start crying & laughing at the same time.

I'm not always
In good mood.
A good mother & wife.

I make with my hands
Yummy food
Anything I put my heart into.

I write
My blog (Im new to writing)

I confuse
Love with showing off.

I need
To have lots of friends like I used to.
To control my temper.
To control eating fried food... actually all my food habits.

I should
Start excercising.
Stop being lazy.
Call my hubby and ask him where the heck he is.. we are getting late for our long drive. Its already getting dark.

I tag
No one since Im new to this bloging world and don’t know many people yet. Any one is welcome to take it if they want to.

Surgery Day

We took the kids out the evening before, thinking they might be in pain after the surgery and won’t be able to go out for a week and it was my son’s last class in the library so had to go there. After library we went to a toy store & then had dinner out. Came home, tried to feed the kids since they didn’t eat much before and they weren’t suppose to eat anything after midnight till after their surgery. We wanted to feed them enough to keep them full till few morning hours.

My daughter didn’t eat anything so gave her milk. We wanted the kids to sleep late so that they feel tired & sleepy the next morning and we could avoid their crying for milk especially my daughter’s. My son was all hyper and playing but my daughter slept in few minutes. He played for almost 2 hrs. And fell asleep around 12:30.

Woke up at 4:30. Both of us got ready, changed the kids & left for the hospital around 5:20. Reached there at 6. My daughter was crying seeing people in while coat thinking she will get shot. So I was walking around with her in lobby. In ½ hr. a lady came in the froggy car to take her to the surgery room. My daughter was scheduled first so that we can feed her soon. Her surgery was at 7:30.The nurses gave her lots of stickers on her way to the surgery room. She was a bit better after she sat in the car with stickers all over her gown. Waited in the recovery room for another 1/2hr… She was waving hi to all the doctors & nurses in the room. Everybody was stopping by to talk to her. By the time the anesthesia lady came, she wasn’t scared anymore. Then the doc came to say hi. He drew a smiley on her thumb and she was busy looking at that. They gave me the while suit to wear and in 10 minutes we were on our way to the surgery room. I could feel my knees weakening as I was taking her.

I put her on a table and they gave her a mask to play with. It was cherry flavor & she was putting it to her nose to smell when they hooked the med. pipe to it. She tried to take it off but fell asleep before I could count 5. Pretty strong fumes.. They told me to wait in the recovery room. I wanted to be in the surgery room but doc said that it is not possible so waited in recovery room.

After 25 minutes my son came down with hubby. He was already playing with the mask. Nice trick.. Talk to hubby about what we did after we came down. Played with my son for some time and saw the nurse bringing my daughter. Was relieved that everything went ok. Took my son to the bed where my daughter was sleeping. He wanted to stay with her but it was time for his surgery so took him to the surgery room.

They told him to smell the mask & tell them if it was cherry or strawberry. After 2-3 times they connect the med tube to it.. He tried to take it off but I was holding him tight. He fell asleep but he was looking at me with his eyes open. They told me to leave. I asked then that his eyes are still open and he might be awake and feel hurt when they will put IV but they assured me that he was sleeping. I can’t forget that look my whole life. He won’t remember any of it but I won’t forget it ever. I felt so helpless but it was for this own good.

Came back in the recovery room. Sat down holding my daughter in my lap. She was still asleep. Talk to the nurses while waiting and in about 35 minutes my son was there. Gave my daughter to hubby and went to hold my son. There beds were opposite to each other in the same room. In another 10 minutes my daughter was fully awake so hubby gave her some warm milk. Waited another 1/2hr. there for my son to wake up. When he was little ok we gave him some warm milk too. They took us upstairs in regular recovery room. My daughter was way too hyper and wanted to walk around. My son was sitting quietly in huuby’s lap. Everyone watching them said their sons are like our daughter, very naughty & daughter are like our son… It was hard to make her sit so nurse took out the IV and I dressed both kids and we were out of the hospital around 11:15.

On our way back we wanted to get some soup for the kids and instead decided to go for a buffet as the kids were very hyper. Fed them few spoons of different soups & they had few bites of other food. Went home, gave them shower & slept.

No one could tell that they had surgery but I was nauseas & had throbbing headache for next 2 days. On Monday I was feeling better when my daughter started throwing up. Called her Orthopedist and made sure it wasn’t related to the surgery then called her pediatrician to talk to her. Since yesterday she didn’t throw up but her other end is leaking. Hopefully she will be fine soon.

Here is the picture 2 days after their surgery.. We were going to temple on Ganesh Chaturthi.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Trigger Thumb

On January 21st this year, we were getting ready for our usual day out. My son was playing while I was getting the diaper bag stuff ready. He started playing with a ball, very lightweight, the kind of they have in McDonald play area. He was keep putting the ball on the floor with one hand and try to pick it up with the other hand while standing. I told him to be careful otherwise he will fall down (mother’s instincts) but they never listen.

After few minutes I saw him trying to pick the ball and instead he fell on his hand while holding the ball. It didn’t seem very big deal at all but he started crying that his hand hurts. I rubbed his hand, pressed it and kissed his boo boo but it didn’t make him feel better. He is skinny and even though he fell on his hand, I mean his body weight on his hand, didn’t make me worry at all. I thought he just want some mommy time so I sat down with him and tried to do silly things to make him feel better.

I was checking every inch of his arm and asking him if it hurt there and massage him trying to make him feel better. Then I reached his hand and start bending his finger to check for anything and he point to his thumb saying it hurt there. I tried to bend his thumb but he started crying with pain. Then I realize that he can’t straighten his thumb. My heart skipped a beat thinking he might have fracture or something. It was few minutes past since he fell over his hand but I didn’t see any swelling so I was thinking he might have sprained it or it is just a case of another dislocation.

Called my hubby to check my son’s hand and get ready to go to hospital. My hubby said it might be the same dislocation kindda thing and will get better in few hours on it own like last time but I was scared & didn’t want to hear anything, so we fought and decided to go to hospital. We paged his ped but by the time she responded we were in the hospital & she said to get it checked since we were already there.

After sitting in the emergency room for sometime, actually very long time, they checked him, did some X-rays & made him put a splint on his thumb. According to them it was a dislocation and splint could make his thumb stay straight and it will be back to normal soon. After whole day in the hospital hubby said “See, I told you so. You overreact every time”. And I am thinking “Well, I am a mother. Its my job to over react over something like this and I am at peace knowing that there is no fracture and If I had to choose all over I will do the same thing again instead of waiting and going to hospital when he is crying in pain.”.

In 2-3 days my daughter had a doctor appointment and we told her to check my son’s thumb too since it was still bending towards his palm. As soon as she saw the thumb & tried to move she said “He has a trigger thumb”. She checked his both hands but they were fine. She explained that it is something he was born with and we happened to notice it the day he fell on his hand. She said its very minor thing, sometimes gets better on its own & sometimes need surgery. As soon as I heard the word surgery I felt my heart in my throat and burning hot inside me. My baby might need surgery? Even though it will be a small one, still. I felt like someone robbed me there. Was in shock and didn’t know what to say. Then she gave us referral for Orthopedic Specialist and as soon as we settled in the car I made an appointment to see him.

Tried to bend & move his thumb in effort to straighten it but no luck. Went to Orthopedic in couple of days. He checked, did X-ray & confirmed that it was trigger thumb and he will need surgery. He said it could be genetic but no one we know had trigger thumb in our families. I told the doc that I will call later to fix the surgery date. I needed some time to absorb the fact that he will need the “local” and doc will make a cut to straighten his thumb. I didn’t even think twice when I had epidural during my both pregnancies but now I feel so week thinking about putting my kids to sleep with medication for few hrs…

Few days later I was playing with my daughter and since trigger thumb was on my mind I started checking my daughter’s hand (yup, didn’t think of checking her sooner). To my worst fear I felt a tiny bump inside of her thumb too.. It was very tiny though but there was a bit bump inside of her right thumb. Made appointment for her to see the same doc. He said it is very tiny and might get better on its own but it hasn’t still. Now my both kids need surgery and hubby blames me for that since I didn’t massage them in their babyhood. And according to him this is the ONLY reason for their trigger thumb. Even though doc said otherwise but he said “Here doctors don’t know anything. I know it is because of no massage.” *sigh

Now my kids, yes both kids, have surgery on this Friday and I am so scared. Even though its short outpatient procedure and we will be out of the hospital the same day still I am sooooo scared. My son is having the surgery first then my daughter.. We asked them to schedule my daughter first as she ask for milk the minute she get up but don’t know yet. I hope everything will go smooth but just thinking about it making me scared & nauseous. Please keep us in your prayers.

update: I get lots of emails from scared mommies regarding trigger thumb. Here is link to the after surgery post.


This was around the time when my son was 13-14 months old and he had just mastered the technique of jumping, jumping and jumping… One night he was playing with the pillows & jumping on the bed (of course we were with him) when all of a sudden he started crying saying uyee, uyee. His left hand hanging almost lifeless and shoulder high like he was trying to hold his arm by elevating his shoulder to his ear. He wouldn’t even let us touch his arm. It was around 12 at night and we thought of going to emergency right away since no doctor office was open at that time.

Then like any first time parent we remember to call his ped first. Paged her and in the meanwhile got everything ready to leave for hospital. I was such a mess seeing him in so much pain. My heart was crying but I tried to hold my tears.

His ped called in ½ hr and said that it is very common in kids since they have very soft bones & it will get better on its own with some movement otherwise come in the office the next morning and she will “click” it to its place. Felt relieved after talking to her and knowing that its not that major since she can fix it in her office and it wasn’t only us but other parents experience something like this too And for some reason it gave me lots of assurance (as first time parents its all about “Is my kid doing what other kids of his age are doing, even though if it was the way they hurt themselves”).

We tried to move his hand very slowly while he fell asleep and after almost 2 hrs he was trying to turn to the other side in his sleep & he himself moved his hand and slept on it. We could not believe it but we were happy cuz he wasn’t crying so it means his hand got better. We checked his hand by moving it in all direction and he wasn’t crying. We went to sleep thinking God has His own way to make kids feel better cuz it did seem miracle to us even thought his ped did mention that something like that would happen still as first time parent we experienced lots of “miracles”.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Thanks Aditya Chopra

Yes, Thanks for making Hum Tum & Neal n Nikki. I don’t know what I would have done without these two movies. My 1 ½ year old daughter is so hooked on these 2 movies that I can’t even think of feeding her without Neal n Nikki and forget about entertaining her without Hum Tum.

I always have Neal n Nikki in the kitchen VCR & Hum Tum dvd ready in the living room cuz you never know when my son & daughter start fighting over something and I have an emergency to find something quickly to distract someone.

Hum Tum sets her moods even before the dvd starts. As soon as she see the cute cartoon boy image on the screen (whom she call by my son’s name), I can see smile on her face and in her eyes. She watches Hum Tum at least 2 times a day till the “chuck de” song then we have to start over again.

And beside all the bad reviews, so much bashing & regardless of the vulgarities, I actually like Neal n Nikki. I think it is different & very entertaining but I wish Tanisha would have worn some cloths. Thanks to our daughter, we have seen Neal n Nikki for about 200 times already (yes, they are watching way too much tv) but not even once we felt bored. No matter what we are doing in kitchen, cooking or eating Or If I need 5 minutes to go to bathroom or make some calls, Neal n Nikki is my savior.. At this age my kids don’t care about the cloths and the sex views they presented in the movie but they love all the songs & laugh when Nikki talks in her screeching voice. Now my daughter calls for Trish 2 minutes before his appearance in the movie & start saying “gana, gana” minutes before the song starts.

Who knew Aditya Chopra could please this young crowd too but they succeeded in their effort to please everyone (at least in my house).

I try to put their other favourite movies like Ganesha, Hanuman, Barney, Teletubbies and other kiddy movies but they all keep her entertained for few minutes only and she starts crying for Nikki. Only these 2 movies let me cook and do things peacefully without any interruption. Now the thing is that since Neal n Nikki is my daughter’s top choice movie I might have to keep an extra eye on her during her teen age years to make sure of things & her making right choices.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Jai-Jai Gussa

Yesterday my son was playing in the living room while I, hubby & our daughter were in the kitchen. All of a sudden I heard

“Mamma, mamma, jai-jai gussa ho gaye hein” (God is getting angry)

I came in the living room to see what he was talking about.

“What happened?”

“Jai-Jai gussa ho gaye hein”


“(Fluctuating action with his hands) Dekho, voh bar-bar light off kar rehein hein”
(He keep switching off the lights)

Then I remember, One day he wasn’t listening to me and all of a sudden it got cloudy & got a little dark. I told my son that since he wasn’t listening to me Jai-Jai gussa kar rahein hei aur unhonein light band kar dee hai.. (God got angry and switched off the light). My son did what I was asking him to do and by the time the sun came out too. Now I had the proof of what I said and God being happy since he listen to me.. hehe..

So yesterday after he said that, I smiled and asked him

“Were you doing something bad?”

“No, No”

“Ok, Be a good boy.. Jai-Jai is watching you.”

I hope he will remember this thing all his life & think of God before he does anything and God will keep giving him signals to make a better choice by turning light on & off from above…

Thursday, August 17, 2006


When I found out that I was having a daughter, very first thing came in my mind was that now my son will have someone to tie him Rakhi.

Last year it was so exciting to see her trying to eat all the sweets I put on the Rakhi thali, play with sindoor & rice and try to snatch Rakhi thread from my son’s hand.

This year she was in different mood on Rakhi day. Didn’t want to sit at all. I tried to hold her for few seconds but she just wanted to walk around, play with her toys and cry for no reason . Every time I tried to make her sit, she started crying.

One of my cousins requested to give him Olives while tying Rakhi because he used to ask for olives every time we ordered pizza in India and it was so funny for them to see him making his own topping choice. Finally she got distracted with Olives I put in one plate but seconds later she wanted to hold the whole plate & started crying again. It was just too much to ask her to sit for 5 minutes still we tried to do everything making her sit for few seconds at a time while my son waited patiently for her to tie Rakhi. I hope she will be in better mood next year..

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Maine kiya Nahin

One of my childhood stories is that I used to eat dirt and if someone happened to see me I used to hide my hands behind my back & start saying

“Maine Mitti nahi khai” (I didn’t eat the dirt) while the dirt was all over my face.

Nowadays my son does all sort of no-no things and guess what, how do I find out??? Well every time he does something that he is not suppose to, he call me and tell me

“Mamma, maine “voh” kiya nahi”

And I come to know what he did.

I understand about features & habbits getting transfer but now your childhood excuse style gets transfer too...

Every time he call me to tell something he "didn't" do, I can’t help but smiling..

Fun Summer

Last summer we couldn’t do many summer activities because our daughter was just a baby & it was hard to plan any big thing with both kids. On our outing day we always used to go to toy stores, play grounds & Chuckee Cheese, so this summer we tried to do what we couldn’t do last year. We thought of planning 2 big activities in a month so that kids could enjoy all without getting tired every week and so far it is working really well..

In the beginning of summer we went to The Bronx Zoo. Actually Hubby wanted to go there since our son was just few months old but I thought he would enjoy it more when he could recognize few animals and by the time he was a year old I was pregnant & didn’t want to walk all day long. Finally we could go this year. Even though its a huge Zoo, we were disappointed because we could hardly see any big animal and by the time we walk all the way to see them they were hiding or sleeping somewhere.. We couldn’t see Lion, Tiger or any other interesting animal. That day they had some problem with the Monorail too so got lucked out on that too. It was good thing that we bought family pass since we were planning on all big summer things and thought we would bring the kids more than once. Even though it was a big disappointment, good thing was that we could use the same pass to go to NY Aquarium & Queens Zoo.

Two weeks after our Bronx zoo trip we went to Aquarium. It wasn’t very big Aquarium but kids had so much fun looking at all those colorful fishes and enjoyed the shamu(seal) show very much. Aquarium is kindda on the beach so we had nice board walk after we were done in Aquarium & they have carnival close to the beach so kids get to enjoy 3 things in one day and everything was so much fun. That was the first day when our daughter enjoyed those kiddy rides the first time and she didn’t want to come home.

Then we decided to do something different and took the kids to Sesame Place. We were thinking that kids might not enjoy that much there since they are just toddlers but we were wrong. They had so much fun there that we decided to visit again soon, even though it was almost 2 hr. drive from our place. So far its been 4 times we went to Sesame Place this summer & planning on going there at least once more. Even though the tickets are a bit expensive but its worth every penny when you see your kids having fun. Even our daughter loves it so much that every time she sits in the car all we hear is “Elmo” “Elmo” cuz she thinks that we are going to Sesame Place AGAIN.

Since Bronx Zoo was a flop trip, we went to another Zoo called Space Farm Zoo. This zoo is not as big or clean like Bronx zoo but you can see & feed the animals there. We went to this zoo last year too but this time we had more fun cuz kids could enjoy it a lot. My son fed the deer & other small animals and that’s what we had in mind when we went there. We wanted them to experience something different and it was great.

Last week we went to the beach. Earlier we went there when our son was few months old and couldn’t go afterwards. Now last week they had blast there. My son enjoyed making “Shivling”, “sand castle” & other stuff while my daughter had fun destroying whatever my son was making. She enjoyed going in water more than my son. She was dragging us in the water and at one point she started running towards the water herself. Hubby & I took turn to walk her in the water while my son enjoyed the sand & Kite Flying. It was very nice feeling when we “girls” were walking around in water & both “boys” were flying kite.

So far we are really enjoying our summer and hopefully before the summer ends we will do some more new things like going to farm to pick fresh strawberries or other fruit OR going to The Children Museum in NY Or something else we find fun for the kids.

Monday, August 14, 2006


Yesterday kids were not in the mood for nap so we decided to bribe them telling if they will sleep they will get Ice-Cream or Popsicle in the evening. I asked my son what he would like to eat later. After few seconds of thinking he decided on having Ice-Cream and I said

OK you can have Ice-Cream later and I will give Popsicle to DD.

Then I thought it was a moment when I can have a little talk with him about choosing something & be happy about it instead of crying for what DD is having and copying her.

You won’t cry if I give her the Popsicle?

No, I want the Popsicle, mamma.

Ok, YOU can have Popsicle & she will eat Ice-Cream.

No, I want to eat Ice-Cream.

Ok then she will eat Popsicle but you can’t ask for it after eating Ice-Cream, OK.

Ok mamma..

Mamma, we can share too na.. Share kar ke Khate hain. Mein thodi si Ice-Cream Kha loonga or phir usko de doonga aur woh mujhe thodi si popsicle de degi.
(We should share. I will eat some Ice-Cream then I will give her the rest & she will give me some of her Popsicle.)

Hubby & I looked each other cuz we didn’t know what to say now.. Maybe we should’ve taught him the “Sharing” lesson after he could learn to choose something & be happy about it but he sure made us speechless.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Scary Evening

Yesterday was just like any other Thursday when we take our son to the library for his 1/2hr. class of story time & coloring. Most of time we go out for dinner afterward since we get out of the library around 6. Y’day we went to temple for 10 minutes then decided to go to Indian market to get some desi food.

Within few minutes it started getting very cloudy. They weren’t just regular cloud but very very dark clouds. We decided to get everything quickly so that we could reach home before thunderstorm shows up. We were just couple of minutes away from home when it started raining very hard. All of a sudden we heard a big lightning striking & saw sparks in front of our car and that too twice. I think I stop breathing for few seconds & thought it was only me who saw this. I asked hubby

Did you see that?

Is our car on fire or something?

He said he saw the same too so we parked the car on the side but couldn’t get out of the car to check the car roof because of very very heavy rain.. The front looked fine, where we saw the sparks falling down. I guess because of the rain sparks couldn’t do any damage. But the cars behind us just passed by so it confirmed that our car was not on fire.. hehe..

We went back to check what happened there and saw that lightening struck on an electricity pole, broke a wire. The big wire was hanging down from 2 places and we happened to pass by at that time.

Well we thank God for saving us otherwise we all wouldh’ve been toasted yesterday. On our way home decided to call the cops to tell them about the broken & hanging electricity wires and saw a fire truck. The lady on the phone connected the call to fire station and told us that they were already on their way to fix that as someone already called them about it. I guess one of the cars behind us inform them before cuz within 5 minutes of our scary experience we saw the fire fighters going that way.

Still we think it was much more than we saw since we were sitting in the car but if someone coming from behind was looking at those sparks falling on the car, must be a very scared as well. Hubby was saying that if the lightning had struck on a tree instead of the pole, the tree wouldh’ve been on our car. O God…

Wednesday, August 09, 2006


My son and daughter were watching dvd when all of a sudden my son goes

“Mamma, Hum P O N kha lete hein”

(We should eat P O N)

“What? What is P O N?”

(I was thinking & trying to figure out but no luck)

“P O N is Ice cream, mamma”

Like other parents we have made code words for few things at home… I C E for Ice Cream, C A N for Candy, M I for Milk etc.. We try not to name any particular thing in front of the kids to avoid the unnecessary drama but looks like we have to figure out some new way soon..

Tuesday, August 08, 2006


My son was in the bathroom doing his “business”. When he was peeing a tiny noise (fart) came out of his other end. He got very excited and said

“Mommy look I can do magic. I can do pee-pee aur phir “paddi”(fart) bhi aa jati hai(then fart comes too).”

I smiled, standing outside the bathroom.

Now he was into more magic tricks..

He tried to burp and after that many tries it had to come so he goes

“Ab mein gale se bhi magic kar sakta hoon” (I can do magic from my throat too)

“Ok, good”

Few seconds later

“Look Mommy, Jab mein butt hilata hoon na toh potty bhi aa jati hai”(Everytime I move my butt, potty comes”)

“Yeah baby, Potty ko patha chal jata hai ke tum butt hila kar use hi bula rake ho”
(Potty knows that you are calling it by moving your butt)

I couldn’t help but smiling on his magic tricks. Didn’t have the heart to tell him that EVERYBODY can do all these magic trick but no one likes to brag about it.. Or do you??

I will let him enjoy his “magic tricks” and later I will embarrass him in front of his girlfriend/wife and kids by exposing his “tricks”.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Potty Training

Lots of things had happened since Friday including potty training. You must be thinking potty training for my daughter who is 16months well No, I was talking about my son who is 3 years and 3 months.

Its not that we didn’t try earlier or he didn’t want to go in regular potty but It was me and my reasons (I had to think of reasons not to feel guilty)… He started telling me while peeing or potty when he was little over 1. I got pregnant at that time and taking him to bathroom 20 times a day in my first trimester was just too much to handle. He was too excited to go to bathroom and most of the times IT was false alarm, then he used to sit there making all those faces try to GO even when he didn’t have to go and in result he was going potty in “installments”.. Yes, installments.. When you try to make every effort to get something out of your body before time, the result is, well in this case, “always something” during every bathroom visit and for me it was the same wiping his front & back, wash his seat and clean the toilet seat for our use and wash his hands & face.. And Maybe you can do it when you are pregnant but I couldn’t so we decided to stop or say postponed it..

Then I tried again when my daughter was a few months old but it was too much to handle at that time too since I had c-section.. We weren’t sending him to any daycare so we decide to take it easy again.

Then I went to India for couple of months and thought I will give it a try there but it was already hard to handle both kids who wouldn’t even let me go to the bathroom or take shower for few minutes, needless to say I was exhausted there. Even though I took the potty seat there(the one you put on top of regular potty) I brought it back minus the part for boy seat to avoid peeing them all over (now I have to push his pee-pee a little bit down to avoid him peeing all over the seat & floor).

I started again 2months back but every time I take off his pant my daughter wanted to take off hers too and saying “No” to her is, lets say not pretty.. She would cry and cry and cry and by the time I made her stop crying doing all the silly stuff, it was time for my son to go pee again.. Needless to say we stopped again hoping to try again some other time.. All this time even though he was not going on regular potty I always talk to him about it, at least once or twice every week. In my mind I was preparing him “virtually”..

Last week on Thursday afternoon he told me that he had to go pee (he mostly announces every time he has to go). He was wearing diaper so I told him ok but he said

“No mamma, I am a big boy now and I want to go to the bathroom.”
(Repeated what I taught him)

Now I couldn’t disappoint him and my daughter was sleeping, so took advantage of that and took him to the bathroom. Both of us were happy with the result. I encouraged him and praise him. Afterwards he didn’t want to “go” in the diaper but couldn't take him cuz my daughter was crying to take her cloths off. So told him to “do” in diaper and waited for hubby to come home. After that I took him once in the bathroom and promise him to take him to the bathroom all day next day. We made a big deal for him using the potty and more praise & kisses until he fell asleep.

On Friday morning when he woke up I ask him if he wants to go pee in the bathroom. He was very excited. I put his training pant afterwards and told him not to pee in it otherwise the buzz light guy (sp?? the character on the diaper) will cry.

We use pull up when we go out since its easy to change than regular diaper and since I was planning on trying to train him earlier I had extra packages of pull ups & nice cotton underwear at home.

My daughter was following us every time and try to take her cloths off but I threatened her to put her in the high chair (She hates sitting in the high chair while my son sits on the regular chair and I will write later how she reacts when I say anything about high chair) and it worked like a charm.

He did great on Friday beside 2-3 false alarms… He pooped too in regular potty. We put diaper at night and in the morning I put cotton underwear instead of training pant. I kept telling him on Friday that if he uses the toilet all day I will put bunny underwear the next day. He was excited.. Saturday we went out and I HATE HATE using public toilet so I changed him into diapers around 12 but he did great till noon. I got my period on Saturday too so Sunday was killer crampy day and I decided to go easy and let him be in diaper.

Today since morning he is doing great But I am going crazy. He is been drinking a lot and its Niagara Falls in our toilet cuz every 10 minutes he tells me that he has to go pee. Two times by the time I wash my hands and went back he was ready to pee again. Still its going fine.. During naptime I put his pull ups.. Just in case.. But he didn’t take a nap and the whole time my daughter was sleeping, we were making frequent trips to bathroom. Hopefully it will go smooth and soon he will be going to the bathroom on his own without my assistance.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Silly Things They Say

Couple of days back when I was changing my son he said very funny thing..

“Mamma, my pee-pee is sleeping”
(I wasn’t sure if I heard it right)


“My pee-pee is sleeping”
(Now I could ignore it or tell him not to say it again to save us from getting embarase but first I wanted to know why he was saying that.)

“Who told you that?”
(Just to check if he had some silly boy TALK with DH)

“Koi Nahi (No one)”

“Then why are you saying that?”

“Aise Nahi Kahete, Pee-pee narazz ho jati hai (Don’t say like that your pee with get mad)” (Do you have some other way to say? Well that’s the best I could think of at that time)

“No mamma, Mein soi-soi kar raha tha tho meri pee-pee bhi soi soi kar rathi thee”
(I was sleeping so my pee-pee was sleeping too (He was sleeping some time before I changed him)

“Ohhh Ok still don’t say like that OK”

“Ok Mamma”

I know this is the beginning but is there any book with all the right answers or ways on how to deal with & explain them when they say silly things and ask silly questions…

Friday, August 04, 2006

Quick Yummy Rasmalai

I was looking for something I could feed them cold since they are not interested in eating proper meals in this hot weather and this was great sweet dish with enough calories.. I used to make everything from scratch but not these days and I have found a great quick way to enjoy the quality dish.

You need only three things to make this…

Swad Rasgullas Can (not rasmalai since its very chewey).
Heavy cream (small pack)
Ground Pista (sweet)(1 serving spoon or more)

Boil the heavy cream with sweet syrup from Rasgulla pack.. I usually put 1 ½ serving spoon syrup then adjust accordingly afterwards. You want to make it a little sweet cuz when it gets cold you won’t feel the sweetness. Let it cool. Put rasgullas in a container, add the heavy cream and sprinkle the ground pista on it.. Serve it chilled.. (I usually prick them with knife or fork, just a little so that they get moist from inside too and I put it in the freezer for 1/2hr.)

One thing for sure that you won’t get this quality rasmalai anywhere in USA.. Try it and see it for yourself..

My Daughter

I could go on and on about what a gift she is, what a beauty she is and how smart and naughty she is… Ever since she turned 1 life around our house has become very interesting… She is practically running the house and she has wrapped us around her little finger.. She can get my son, who is almost 3 ½, in soo much trouble for the things she does and taught him to be bad… There are lots of incidents happen every day that I want to remember of her but let me just mentioned what happed just few minutes back..

She was jumping over & rolling with my son.. I was watching them not to bang their head on the floor too hard but since they were enjoying & laughing, I let them continue even though I wanted to stop them before they start to cry after one gets hurt. I just turned to my computer for few seconds and heard

“My diaper, My diaper”

“Huh, What!!”

And when I looked she was trying to lower his diaper from behind (I could see his butt crack) and try to pinch him & do “gui gui”(tickling).

I ran to stop her before she could totally strip him down. I yelled at my son for not stopping her and letting her touch his diaper and when I turned around she was not there.. Found her hiding behind the door of one of our rooms with a big smile.. Now did she know she was going to get yelled at? I didn’t have the heart to yell her as she looked so cute hiding quietly.. But she sure got my son in trouble for no reason..

She is really very very naughty but I wouldn’t want her to be any other way.. I kiss her so much even when she causes so much chaos and make my day very very hectic and keep me on my toes all day long but she is the one who love me & kiss me like a mother.. yes like a mother.. And I am soooo thankful to God for sending such a blessing in our life.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

When and What to Feed My Kids

When it comes to parenting I have very very laid back approach. I try to go with the flow all day. Sometimes I read what other moms are doing and getting things done in a better way and I try to do things the different way but it doesn’t work for me and in no time I am back to my ways.. Feeding kids is one of them.

DS is not big on eating and if I try to force him to eat something he poops right away. So first making or should I say forcing him to eat then change him right after, taught me a lesson to leave him alone..

With my DD it’s a different story. When she was a baby she used to throw up almost all day long then some days she was hungry every ½ hr. and few days she announce a strike by not eating for almost 10 continuous hrs… Needless to say I was going crazy and making call to her ped almost everyday with different feeding issue and visiting the ped office very often. After all this she was ok in the weight dept. and ped told me to look at her all day consumption instead of numbers of feeding or what she had in first half or second half of the day..

Well this changed my whole way of feeding my kids. Now if they say they are not hungry I try to give them crackers or cookie or some other snack thinking

“Ok if not meal at least let these little fishy crackers swim in your tummies”

And these crackers are cheesy ones so they are getting something more than just a regular cracker.

I try to get cookies with cream.. I know the sugary part but when your kids refuse to eat for half a day they need sugar (I make myself think this). I try to give them a bite of 2-3 different flavor them ask them which one they like better and this way they take a bite again of their favorite one and I feel proud of myself tricking them into eating a cookie and don’t forget cream cookies are double.

And as long as I think I tricked them into eating something that will keep them full for ½ hr. I am happy and hopeful that they will soon get hungrier and will be able to eat a decent meal. Now it’s a different story when after ½ hr. I am repeating the tricks to feed them again.. Or trying new tricks like singing silly songs, telling them new invented stories or putting a movie while feeding them.. Still its all worth it as long as they eat..

Last few days of heat are really the killer ones.. Everybody is so restless and since y’day kids refuse to eat anything beside having their morning cup of milk.. Actually that too only ½ cup.. First I was thinking there intake is low because of the weather and it will be fine soon but come on, didn’t know it can go further down.. No eating till noon that too I have to force something down their throat afterwards..

Y’day I waited till 11 for them to say “Ok Mamma, we want food now” but nothing.. So I had to take charge and thought of something which can satisfy them even if they take only few spoons of it. So I made pulao with potatos, onion, peas, corn and beans (black eye ones). Now this is healthy & quick.. And I can boost the calories with Desi ghee..

In my mind first 4 spoons filled with all veggies are considered breakfast (the one they missed in the morning) and then I was thinking 4 more spoons will be their lunch (Talk about Mother’s calculations) and I will be lucky if they want to eat more.. Bonus for me.. Then I can give something to drink and they will be full till after their nap.. They likes the dish & ate good amount And I was happy to make a winner dish that interests my kids who were in no eating mood..

Today was same way, they refused to eat so I knew to chill for little while & let them get tired.. Had left over pulao but they weren’t that interested still had couple of spoons and I gave them coconut water to drink since it was very hot today..

Like their activities to keep them busy I have to plan on always having few things in my house for them to eat because you never know of their mood.. Some times they say no to everything I give them so if I have few things to give them they finally choose.. Here are the things works for me..

1. Desi Ghee (to add calories)
2. Rice (to make pulao)
3. Lunch meat with Mayo and bread(If I am lucky) (smoked turkey, ham, pepperoni)
4. Make Parantha (Plain or Besan)
5. Eggs (boiled or egg salad)
6. Peanuts
7. Mango Fruity
8. Bread & Jelly
9. Beans( 3-4 different kind) (I either mix them in pulao or just feed them with salt)
10. Mayo with garlic to serve with bread or rice
11. Mixed Fruit Can
12. Crackers
13. Cookies
14. Emergency baby food can for DD
15. Naan
16. Chicken tikka masala (they really love this)
17. Chicken nugget (frozen)
18. Pop corn chicken
19. Hot Dogs
20. Pop corn
21. Hot Pocket
22. Allu Pakodas
23. Bread Pakodas
24. Papad (colorful & wheel ones)
25. Snack bar with whole grain( 1 bar is snack and 2 are meal)
26. Garlic bread (Homemade)
27. Bread Butter
28. Pizza
29. Chinese food
30. Soup
31. Pretzels with cream cheese
32. Fresh fruits especially red pear & grapes
33. Allu Sabji with salt & black pepper (all time favorite)
34. Pancake (sweet & salty)
35. Besan Puda

If nothing works I give them 1-2 chocolate bites/ chips/ cake/ Ice cream or any junk food I have at home.. Empty calories are still better than them sleeping with empty stomach..

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

MY Dear Husband

It was a while ago when you used to drive for 2-3 hr. and bring a rose & card to see me at my work and college… You did this for quite a few times until I said “yes” against my father’s wish cuz I knew you would be a great husband since you care to come that far almost 1-2 times a week just to see me. You still are a great husband but where is that romantic guy whom I married? Did he disappear soon after our marriage? Is there any way we came bring him back? Even though you are a great guy I miss the “you”, I met before marriage.

You are a great guy and I feel lucky

When I say lets order food for almost every meal of the week and you say ok…

When I decide to choose everything in the house and you go along with me..

When you take care of the kids whenever I want you to.. You change them and feed them when I am too exhausted to do that after a long long day..

When you say Saturday is my day & mostly Sundays too and I can plan whatever..

When I buy lots of things which I don’t need or use and some of them are still unpacked but you don’t say anything And the next time we go out you still ask me to buy something..

When I say and you make a nice cup of tea for me.. even though you don’t drink tea still you can make it perfect for me (well most of the times)

When I say I am missing India and you tell me to visit there anytime..

When you call the kids every other day when we were in India..

When you tell me to go sleep while you take care of the kids…

When I call my family in India sometimes everyday and you don’t say anything..

When we go on long drives including our trips to far away kiddy places..

But what I want to know is that

Why can’t you appreciate when I cook keeping the kids busy while talking & doing stuff for them which takes my double energy still you don’t happily eat what I made.. Not that the food I cook isn’t good but you don’t like to comment.. Well Its ok once in a while to appreciate the effort and making a comment on something beside stuffing your head in tv with no expression AT ALL.. which leads to me thinking why the heck did I trouble myself & kids and decide to order the next time or the whole next week..

Yes, you let me choose stuff for the house but why couldn’t you give any opinion or just pretend to say few things, if you like it or not after all its your house too… We were still going to buy the stuff I picked out but I wouldh’ve been happy to know that you are equally excited to decorate the house too instead of just driving me around to all the furniture places..

You take care of the kids only when I ASK you to or sometimes tell you to do 20 times before you do it.. Why can’t you take care of them a bit every day so that I can relax and do something for myself.. You say the kids want me around while sleeping or other stuff but all I have to say is to give it a try for few times and let them get used to to you.. Don’t expect me to be there every minute when you are taking care of the kids otherwise there is no use for your taking care if I can’t finish cleaning or just want to sit alone for some time or do other stuff which I was planning to do when you take care of the kids..

Even though we have picked few kid friendly places where we go during weekends why you ask me tell you every weekend where to go.. Why can’t you say “ok lets go there today”.. Which will make me think that you are just not the driver to take us where we want but you are interested in what we do for the kids and its not a punishment for you of the weekend.. Not that you don’t like where we go but I am fed up deciding every time..

Most of the times I buy lots of things for kids but you don’t say anything because in your mind, me buying stuff is a replacement or making up for the no attention during the week and shopping is happiness for me especially when I get something for kids..

Every morning You watch tv in the kitchen drinking milk & eating bananas but tell me how hard it is to put a tea bag, sugar & water in the cup and leave it in the microwave. You will do that if I ASK you shouting from the bathroom “Can you make tea”.. I can do it too.. no big deal but sometimes doing things without me ASKING for it will make me feel that you care.. that’s all..

I know anytime I want I can pack our bags & go to India but it kills me to think that you must be happy to be alone & not miss us even for a second.. Even though you say that what I THINK and its not true but I know you, if we weren’t married, you wouldh’ve been happily working 24 hrs. a day even forget to eat sometimes too.. But I don’t know anyone who can live so many days without their family and not miss them.. And YOU call them LOSER.. but let me tell you those LOSERS have a satisfying life.. Even though You say that everybody don’t get everything but I really wish you were that type of family loving loser.. I would take that type of loser anytime over your type..

Why do I have to tell you to call us when we are in India so that people will feel that you care about us.. Even when you call you can’t find anything to talk about.. And in explanation you say that “you know Im not the talking type” but what happens to not talkative type when you talk about whats going all over the world.. See my world is my family and I want you to talk about us too..

I can go to sleep when you take care of the kids only if you watch them the whole time without watching tv or keep playing with them and keeping them busy so they don’t hurt themselves or you don’t need to slap them & make them cry within 5 minutes I leave.. I still don’t feel that you can responsibly take care of them cuz even when I tell you look after them when I want to drink tea peacefully I have to tell you so many times to stop them from hurting themselves or fighting.. Show me that you are capable when Im there and I will be able to trust you with kids more..

Sometimes I even call twice a day to talk to my family in India because I need to make an adult conversation with someone.. To fill the void and feel that someone care about me, I call India alot..

You know I love long drives and you always want to take me to see beautiful places since we got married and now when we take kids to far places to show them stuff but you have to know that sitting quietly for that long without ANY conversation or even a peep, is not fun.. how long can you hear the songs after all and you go out on drives so that you can get away from things, share & feel the love for each other but tell me how can we do that without even talking.. you are not a driver who takes orders & go.. so try to act like a husband not a driver..

And I HATE HATE when you say that taking care of the kids is no work and what YOU do is work and hard.. let me tell you if you just let them wonder and ignore what they are doing or getting hurt or killing each other, its not a work but when you care them not to make them cry, try to keep them busy & teach them things which I think you lack in your personality, its lots of work..

Even though I feel this way about things like other wives on the earth who has complaints against their husbands still I love you and I can’t live without you but I wish you had feelings to appreciate things & respect me.. Things are not that important but feelings are.. You are a great guy & great father but I really wish you had few feelings to feel the warmth of love and understand me..

You always treat my like a queen but whats the fun when you just act like you are serving me.. I want you to be the KING of this queen not a servant..