The Decision

Being parents is not an easy job. No matter what I do and how many times I think over before doing something, I always question myself if it’s the right choice I made. We always knew that we are gonna have 2 kids but how soon after the first one, was unclear. After A was few months old I thought having baby was not like I heard (because of the wonderful doc who delivered A, no pain or anything) and A was always very good since day1. I wanted to have another baby soon so that I go through sleepless night, diaper change, potty training & all baby related issues at the same time. Waiting for another 3-4 years to have another baby seemed too much. And I wanted A to have someone to play with soon:-) Although I did think if it was unfair to A cuz being pregnant with a baby around & having another kid when ur first born needs your attention all the time is not good and its not the same as first time when you can rest whenever you feel like it and have a guilty free pregnancy. Still it seemed the right choice for us cuz he was just a baby then we thought by the time I will deliver, he wouldn’t be asking for that much attention anyway and afterwards it won’t be bad since I can give him all the attention he wants. But from time to time I do think if it was the right decision we made and is it fair to A since she gets all the attention from us but there are other times when I am 200% sure that it was the right decision.

Today was one of those days when I felt it was the right decision:-) why? Well this is what happened.. Few weeks back I met a new friend S whose daughter is in A’s class. They had few school holidays during end of jan till first week of feb. Everytime we talked on the phone, S sounded awful. She complaint how her daughter is crying to go to school, not letting her do anything till evening, making her play all day long arranging tea parties, beauty parlor & pizza ordering game. Well it does sound like fun but not when you are playing against ur will and all day long for almost everyday. So many times we had to cut short our conversation because her daughter started playing with the phone, dialing# or crying.

The other day she was crying because she didn’t want to brush her teeth & S said that everyday it takes ½ hr. of crying to get her to brush her teeth. Today when I called her, her daughter was crying because she wanted someone to play with her and the girl next door was still sleeping and couldn’t come for another hr. or 2. Then she mentioned some other stuff that her daughter does & they let her get away with it cuz they feel guilty because of her crying.

I told her that every time I talk to her, I thank God for having my kids so close together;-) I even suggested that they should have another kid since her daughter is already 4year old;-) I really feel bad for her daughter cuz she really want someone to be there all the time to play with her.

Now my kids keep me busy all day long too. Even when I go to bathroom they come looking for me & stand outside the bathroom till Im done but they never feel bored even for a second. Actually days feel shorter compare to what they want to do all they long:-) Because of their less age difference they enjoy same kind of things and have lots of fun all day long:-) They draw on each other hands & feet instead of mine;-) Atleast 10 times a day A feels like he became bigger than he was the last minute and he can check it by picking gudiya up & feel happy:-) They enjoy same silly movies and sing & dance holding each other’s hands. One makes houses from blocks & other wants the same block instead of the whole bin next to them so another episode of fun comes in the picture after that:-) Even when I put them in bed and it takes me 10 minutes to do some stuff A makes sure that gudiya is not upto anything and he make her sleep on his pillow, put her favorite video & put comforter on her:-) I don’t even need to say that, he does all that by himself:-)

My bhua had her daughter when her son was 4-5 years old & when she started crawling, it was tough cuz she would take his books, pen & stuff and he used to get very irritated. Ofcourse it was fine few years later but they didn’t enjoy their childhood like my kids are enjoying. (My opinion;-)

But there are times when I feel the other way, that’s only because she gets lots of attention and most of time when we are giving A some time she gets all angry & we have to take care of both of them at the same time and this eliminate the chance of one to one time with A when I really think that he needs those few Mommy & Daddy minutes everyday. And both of them make so much chaos & keep me on my tows all day long. I am always scared of them chasing each other very fast & falling down 20 times a day and I don’t know how everyday they come up with new ideas of doing some mischievous things to make me scream & yell..

Still I love it :-)